alternative lyrics to leonard cohen’s hallelujah


i’ve heard there was a secret lotion
that david applied in a circular motion
but you don’t really care what he does, aleesha
it goes like this
the hooded pullover
the bottled cure, the major comb over
the baffled king covering up his alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

your faith was strong but your eyesight stronger
you couldn’t bear it any longer
the reflection in the moonlight was quite a feature
she tied me to a kitchen chair
she looked real hard, but she found no hair
and from my lips she drew the alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

baby i have been here before
i’ve wept and wailed upon this floor
when the doctor said that i should take propecia
the pills were swallowed without compunction
but i ended up with erectile dysfunction
it’s a cold, and it’s a floppy; alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

there was a time when you let me know
what’s really going on below
but now it’s up the top i need you, teacher
oh is it the gene sox-21
that’s made my hair as good as gone
or is it iron deficiency causing my alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

maybe there’s a god above
but all i’ve ever learned from love
is that it’ll take someone special to want this creature
oh why does my head have to shine so bright
oh why did i tie my ponytail so tight
i maybe could’ve avoided alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

you say the reason i’ve lost my mane
is due to the fact that i was so vain
but you liked me taking care of my appearance, aleesha
and now i rattle with finasteride
drip with rogaine, pop flutamide
i’d consider surgery for this alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

i stay at home, i don’t go out
the surgery failed, and so i doubt
there’s hope for me now; i’ve even tried a preacher
we prayed and sang, were thoroughly methodical
but nothing stirred, not even a follicle
i’m destined to spend eternity with alopecia

alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia
alopecia, alopecia

Leave a comment


  1. David might have been bald… We’ll never know. 🙂

    • all the paintings depicting him show him with hair, but don’t always believe your eyes….unless the song was about dave ‘baldy’ mcbald from baldshire in baldland……who was definitely bald

  2. I love a good song rewrite. This one scales the heights and plumbs the depths. Fantastic word play. Plus, I actually sang it out loud, and it works.

  3. Abdul Serabia

     /  10 February, 2013

    Alopecia is described as a condition in which the immune system eradicates the hair follicles. Alopecia can lead to hair loss on the scalp and elsewhere on the body. In most cases, the hair is lost in small, quarter-sized amounts and usually does not exceed the amount of a few patches. In more extreme cases, Alopecia can progress to cause complete hair loss of the scalp and other areas of the body. White blood cells in the immune system rapidly attack cells in hair follicles that make the hair grow. These affected cells become small and slow down hair production..

    Make sure you visit our internet site as well

  4. Sweet fancy Moses, this is perfection. Like Arthur, I sang it out loud too and it works great. I say we create an enchanting duet next time.

    • It is good isn’t it…if I say so myself…it made me laugh.
      As to enchanting duets; this is my next project (although started over a year ago) – – which will explode onto the blog world with a guest post on Arthur’s blog…if we can work out what we need to do!


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